A Letter to My Husband

Hey internet? Have you ever wanted to run naked through a crowded room? I guess I do….

Dear WH,

Today is Thursday. This is the hard part. I generally hit the wall on Thursdays. I didn’t sleep well last night, and I miss you so very much. I miss your voice and your touch and your smell. I miss knowing that you are at home, waiting for me. I miss having you to talk to and laugh with. It’s a rainy day, and I made the mistake of trying to listen to my Gordon Lightfoot cd. I hear you singing to me. Yes, your wife is crazy. I love you so much. I know that this is good, that it’s right, that we need it. That doesn’t stop this deep ache, this incredible longing, just to hear your voice, to smell you, to touch and hold you and be held. You are my world. I hope you’re good, that you got a good group and that you’re learning, growing and enjoying yourself. I love how happy this makes you. I love that you are at peace. I even love this ache, somehow. It’s good to ache for you, to want you more than anything I’ve ever wanted in the world. It reminds me of the days when our love was new, when I didn’t know that we would make this life together. The anticipation was delicious torture. This is not so delicious right at the moment, but it’s like overusing a muscle that’s fallen out of form. Tomorrow it will still ache and burn a little, but I will feel stronger, prouder. I will appreciate the special bond that we have. The people who tell us that we have that great love, the kind of love that novels are written about, the love that starts wars and ends them- they’re right. How can we make sure we don’t forget? I don’t want to ever forget this- how much I love you, how badly I need you, what it’s like to have to be without you and wait for you. I want to remember this the next time I get caught up in some petty bullshit (like the top half of this page, which I am still saving for you, if only because it’s my two biggest flavors of crazy, all wrapped up in one letter) and think that it’s worth the argument. “If I could only have you near, to breathe a sigh or two, I would be happy just to hold the hands I love…….”

I miss you, and I love you to the ends of this green earth, and I am so proud of you that there isn’t room in my heart for all of it. That’s why I cry- I have to make room.

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4 Responses

  1. You’ve been linked!

    Thanks for the exchange 🙂

  2. I LOVED this post. Loved.

  3. Awwww…Cat! So sweet how much you love him. *Hugs*

  4. […] grew up together. They had victories and defeats, they fought and made up, they loved each other more than they could stand, and sometimes they couldn’t stand each other. They made countless wonderful memories […]

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